…It wasn’t pretty.

There was foul language.  Spelled outloud.  My kid won’t know the words, but he’ll be spelling them.  Or saying one particular word beginning with S and ending with T in German, because somehow that makes it not a bad word.

There were hours of frustration.  Six to be exact. (That’s just the failing icing, not the entire cake.)

In the end, the fondant won.  I threw in the towel.  I was trying to make marshmallow fondant in five colors.  Red, blue, white, gray, and black.  Red and black were the death of me.  I had no gloves to wear, and if you’ve used Wilton Food Coloring Gels before, you can imagine how my hands must look.

I can feel every tendon and muscle connected to my fingers or my right hand.  My fingers and fingernails are rainbow colored.  And when I bent my finger, my knuckle split open (you have to knead it forever).  That was when I gave up on the fondant and decided to stick with buttercream.  I am my own worst critic.  I hate the way the cake looks.  Believe it or not, I feel like I disappointed him.  I know that sounds crazy.  But he had ideas about the cake, and I just knew I could do it.  And then it didn’t work.  So yeah.  That sucked.

Pictures are coming.  I promise.

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Bake your cake (use leftover batter from trial Herbie hiding beside the coffee maker).

Decorate your cake.  Have fun with icing.


The Best step: Eat your cake.

Yummy.  My mess up – turned heart.
Clean up after your cake and fellow “celebrators”

Either that or just eat the remaining icing with a spoon.

Bonus recipe.  Never use store bought icing again.  1/2 stick of butter, 8oz pack of cream cheese (both softened), and powdered sugar to taste, half a bag or so.  Best.  Icing.  Ever.

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The bottom left picture is not part of the other two pictures, but something different, and edible.

To the party-goers: Please see that you eat as little sugar as possible this week, as we have your week’s supply covered at the party! haha

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Would you believe me if I told you, I’m really not that indecisive about clothes.  More like, throw on a sweat shirt, hair in a pony tail, I really just don’t care.  This is my fairytale.  I’m the princess.  And the princess wears enchanted sweatpants and glass sneakers.  Only, down here in the South, we call them tennis shoes.  Beam me up What Not To Wear.

Instead I choose to spend all the time I could be working on my atrocious tinkering with my website’s dress code.  But I think I really like this current scheme.  I got all snazzy with some rounded corners, and then gave up quickly on figuring out how to round the corners of the white background space.  I’m trying to simplify.  Websites get cluttered just like every other corner of our lives.  Even made myself some buttons for all of my three adoring fans who likely have no interest in having a button on their website for my blog.  But it is cute, right?!  I’m have been thinking about some type of weekly events to liven things up around here.  So look forward to….something!  I’m feeling a bit vague tonight, stringing thoughts together out of left field.

I did my grocery shopping at 10:30pm alone.  It was quite strange to be out…after dark or without child, take your pick.  Caleb has been sick this weekend.  First time since last January (as in 2008), so I can’t complain too much.  He had a fever Friday night and a weak stomach for the last 24 hours.  Let’s just say I spent the entire day cleaning the carseat.  Handwashing the cover, wiping off straps without submerging them, had to breakout the dustbuster as there were enough crumbs in that thing to build a sandwich.  Who am I kidding, crumbs rule my life.

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How about this…

Yesterday, yesterday, I bought the Wilton Cruiser cake pan off ebay to make this infamous Herbie cake.

Today, not even 24 hours later, I find this newly listed, apparently extremely rare, not to mention highly detailed cake pan (I say rare because I searched high and low for a VW cake pan already).

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Friday, February 20, 2009 – Last Friday

9:30-11:30am - Time Warner is scheduled to hook up the cable and internet.

1:26pm – Time Warner arrives.  Or the pothead in the creepy blue van that Time Warner has contracted the job out to arrives.  His laptop has the Southpark Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo for a screen saver, I shit you not.  Emblazoned on his screen are several turds in Santa hats with “Happy Holidays from Time Warner” written amongst them.   Is it February?  But really, the fact that Christmas was two months ago mattered significantly less than the dancing turds on the screen.

1:38pm - My sister inlaw announces that they need to head out (they had come by with the ultrasound pictures).  Caleb leans against his auntie looking up at her and wrinkles his brow.  “You have stuff up your nose.” I hide my face in shame.  “Well what is it?!” she begs the answer.  “Buuuggers!”  He’s mine, he’s all mine, wouldn’t pay the gypsies to take em.

3:52pm – Phone rings, it’s dad.  He’s calling for permission to rain check on helping with the move.  My mom informed him he should help.  But I know that we have plenty of help and he needs to go home (away from his apartment where he lives during the week).  He needs the mental and physical separation from the extreme stresses of his job.  Permission granted.  He asks what I’m doing.  I’m throwing stuff in boxes like it is going out of style.  I know there is a 24 foot truck inbound.  Caleb is…well…keeping himself entertained.  Okay, okay, you got me, I’m taking pictures instead of throwing stuff in boxes like I should be doing.

Here’s one of those sentences you never knew you’d say before you were a parent:  “Caleb you got stickers on the dryer when you were crawling in.  Please get them off.  And get out, I need to put the clothes in there!”  Yes I was still scrambling to do laundry in the ‘eleventh hour.’  I was determined we would move with all clean laundry in case I didn’t recover my washer and dryer for a week.  Scott squashed my determination by putting an immediate halt to the laundry campaign and loading the washer and dryer on the truck first.  And yes, it was nearly a week before that campaign resumed.

5:17pm – Everybody in the car, we’re going to Dominos.  No, wait, that was lunch Saturday.  Hardee’s!  Nope, breakfast Saturday.  McDonald’s, we’re going to McDonald’s.  Mom of the year, right here. *points to self*  One child covered in stickers wearing gigantic bear slippers in carseat, one Bat-a-raffe (giraffe dressed like a bat) in child’s lap.  I am digging through my purse for something when a little voice pipes up from the backseat.  “Mommy?  Where’s Charley’s penis?”  Thinking.  Thinking.  Ummmm. Stall tactics.  I forgot something in the house.  That’s it.  I forgot something.  I look up as Scott is opening the driver’s side door.  “Ask your dad!” I exclaim and slam the door to retrieve something from inside while congratulating myself on passing off that question.  Also, I may or may not have been laughing hysterically.

5:19pm – Back in the car.  “What’d ya say to that one?”  “I told him it was between his legs!  Where else would it be?”  OKAY.

5:26pm - She’s taking pictures in the drive through.  Why did she have to go back in to get her camera?  Why, why, why?  One day, when your son or daughter asks you the location of his/her lovey’s manhood sweetie, you’ll understand.

I’m embarrassing him already, he’s only three.  Hey buddy, I’m not the one wearing stickers and bear slippers with the bat-a-raffe

The people behind us probably think I’m nuts.  Oh well, we’re moving.  Who cares?

Don’t worry, the night got less and less funny as it went on.  Reality set in.  I’m a pack rat.  And a procrastinator.  Not a good combination.  We stayed up late loading 75% of the house into the truck.  The only pieces of furniture left were the beds when we got in them that night.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

8:37am - Hardee’s new country potatoes suck.  What were they thinking replacing hashbrowns with those???  I don’t want hacked up steak fry tidbits at 8:37am!  That’s all.

1:15pm – Caleb hugs and kisses the baby.  My heart explodes into a million pieces. Read more here.

2:52pm – BJ helped us move.  He needs to be on his way home by 3:15pm at the absolute latest, as he is playing the piano for a wedding at 5:00pm.  His car as at our old house.  Crap.  20 minutes away.  Crap, crap, crap.  Realize that we need to hightail it.

3:13pm – BJ tucks and rolls when we get to his car.

8:29pm - Caleb passes out with his little knee in the air (foot flat on the bed) he is so exhausted.

8:39pm - We are too tired to even hook up the computer ( the first time we’ve ever moved without hooking up the computer and TV on the same day).  Grab the laptop and cram the ethernet cable in the side.  Check email to reduce internet withdrawal jitters.  I was in the dark for 31 hours.  Scott made it 39.  So it’s only fair that he get first dibs.  I’m impatient anyhow.  Oh great internet, how I missed thee.

8:53pm - Lights out.  Scott slept on the couch, I slept on a mattress (no boxspring) in the floor in Caleb’s room.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

6:47am - Rise from the dead.  Or actually Caleb did.  Despite the early hour, I actually feel well rested and slept amazingly well on the floor.  Are you bored yet?  I’ll skip ahead.

Monday, February 23, 2009

10:16am - Trying to return to a sense of normalcy.  AKA we have no groceries, so instead of unpacking, we’ve taken a trip to “Law-mart,” as Caleb calls it, for provisions.

11:24am - We decided to pretend it is a vacation and wandered around the store for an hour.  Checking out now.  I’m digging through my wallet when I hear giggling.  Both the kid and the cashier.  From the corner of my eye, I see neon green Buzz Lightyear tighty whiteys waving through the air.  “Put your underwear back in my purse,” I hiss.  More giggling.  Another one of those sentences I never knew I’d say.  Cashier raises eyebrows.  I avoid eye contact.

11:31am - Take shopping cart to cart return while on the phone with Scott.  Walk slowly past and come almost in arm’s reach of a little bird perched on the carts before he flits away.  Tell Scott about it as I’m getting in the car.  Caleb asks, “Did he crap on you?”  Sigh. I’ve taught him well, haven’t I?  “No Caleb, he didn’t poop on me.”

12:59pm - I fell upside down in a box with my feet waving in the air while trying to write this diary and decided it was time to give it up.  Nah, just kidding, I hadja going though didn’t I?  It would have been funny.  I would have laughed.  No honestly, the times are approximate, I actually only made a few notes here and there on a text document.  It actually looks like a strange code that could only be deciphered by a mommy blogger.

PS. I think I found my wit.

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Rooms that is.  I finally pushed through the kitchen today.  It is probably 90% complete.  I know there are still some boxes in my car with my knives and, gasp, dirty dishes that were put in boxes on the last trip (more on that later).  The dishwasher is currently sitting in a corner, hubby hooked it up last night, but it has to have a cabinet built around it, so we put a box on top of it to weigh it down so we could use it without it tipping over.  Because the world was coming to an end without the dishwasher.  And you can’t really eat cereal off paper plates that I strictly ordered kindly requested everyone please use.  There are a few things lurking on top of the cabinets (that I cut out of the picture on purpose).  But I’m quite excited to eat our first meal at the kitchen table, without things falling off and having to rest my feet on a box.

But what you can’t see lurking around the corner…it decided to rain today, thus I had to clear off the outdoor storage deck of all the things that I didn’t want wet.  So I put as much as I could in the storage building and the rest ended up just inside the door blocking my washer and dryer and one bathroom.

I hope you’ve been enjoying all of the pictures, aka scheduled posts.  I sat down last Thursday night and scheduled posts for the next six days.  Thus all the one liner/picture posts.  I do have a few posts floating around in my head.  Don’t worry, I’ve made notes so I don’t forget them!

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At least one thing is nice and neat. And has been since the morning after we moved.  Normally we would do it the night of the move, but we were just that tired.  I think our lights were out Saturday night by 8:45pm.

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In no particular order

If you don’t hear from me for a week, send in a search party.

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Today is a very special day.

Meet BJ and Teresa.  BJ is Caleb’s cousin.  They were married just a few months after Caleb was born. I can quite honestly say these are two of the best people you will ever meet.  They are amazing, generous, kind, and loving.

On New Year’s Day, we had a huge family breakfast at my mother inlaw and sister inlaw’s house.  I noticed that BJ was carrying Caleb and pacing the hall as everyone migrated to the living room after having their fill.  When everyone was there, Caleb came walking in with a photo album and handed it to me.  I opened it up and sat there in complete disbelief.  In front of me were three ultrasound pictures.  I immediately felt my eyes well up with tears, and I just kept staring at the pictures, examining the dates.  I knew what it meant, I just couldn’t get the words from my head to my mouth.  12 weeks and 2 days with a healthy pregnancy.  This might seem like pretty typical news for a young couple who had been married for a few years, but it was a long and difficult road for BJ and Teresa.  These two people who were, by all definitions, meant to be parents.  They have so much love to give.  After two hopeful pregnancies ending with sadness and over two years of trying, they prayed and decided to put the decision in God’s hands.  And as of late June our family will add one.  One grandbaby, one great grandbaby, one second cousin once removed, one beautiful healthy little life.

Almost four years ago, holding Caleb

I was so honored that they chose to tell the family by giving me the photo album (with exception of the grandmother and great grandmother to be of course – they found out Christmas Eve).  The absolutely amazing part… the day after Chrismtas, Caleb asked my sister inlaw (the grandmother to be) if there was a baby Teresa or a baby BJ in Teresa’s belly.  It was so strange, the question came completely out of left field.  It was like he knew somehow.  At the time, I was so relieved that BJ and Teresa weren’t there, but now I wonder, if they had been, would they have spilled the beans early?!

Today is the 20 week ultrasound.  We find out, pink or blue.  I will be waiting by the phone!  Today, we went to the bank where Teresa works.  Caleb carried a pink rose in a baby bottle and after us reminding him, he said “We’re thinking pink!”  You know how they say pregnant women are glowing?  Well she lights up the room.

This past fall

One incredibly hard decision  when you become parents is deciding whom might take over your job, should something ever happen to both of you.  We are both lucky and blessed to have BJ and Teresa in our family.  They love Caleb so much and they are wonderful with him.  It makes a hard decision a little bit easier.

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