It sure is hard to believe you are three years old. I have been a bit sad today honestly. And last night. And the last couple weeks. I stayed up late cleaning up the nuclear fallout that was our house. It took me three hours to get three rooms under control. Two rooms and a few blocks on the floor in the third actually. I wanted today to be yours completely. I didn’t want to worry with the house. I sat down last night when I was all done and just stared at your pictures. My how you have changed. Each month that passes I find myself thinking, this is absolutely the best age. Surely it can’t get any better than this. I just want to freeze you at this age forever. But another month passes, and with it come new things, requiring me to revise my “favorite” age.

An hour old

A day old

I have now realized, I am trying to kill myself, one ridiculously difficult birthday cake at a time. We did a construction theme for your first birthday, so messy was okay. I can still remember Scott and I suddenly both waking up at 3:30am. We couldn’t believe both of us woke up at the same time, and looked at the clock. We counted down the minutes until 3:35 and we both kissed you and told you Happy Birthday as you lay there snuggled between us sound asleep. At 3:36, Scott started snoring again. I was up until around 5:30am reliving those first hours like a movie recorded in my head and played back on the dim ceiling of the bedroom.

The smash cake

For your second birthday, I must have looked up one gazillion different vehicle cakes. I settled on a Disney Cars themed cake. Four birthday cakes later, I had the 1.5 cakes I needed.

For Christmas, your grandmother (my mom) gave you a cake pan that bakes little car shaped cakes. As soon as I saw it, I knew it had birthday written all over it. We decorated cakes in February, and I began the baking process Thursday. We had to reschedule the birthday party at the last second, so I started over on Saturday so that the cakes would be fresh for Sunday’s party. Let me tell you little man, I sure hope you appreciated it, because I actually dreamed about baking cakes. No lie. I was so worried I wouldn’t have time to finished decorating Sunday morning, that I dreamed I was painting little cars in my sleep. When we were pulling out of the driveway, I calmly turned to Scott and said, you are a Sunday afternoon driver and you are 80 years old. I fully expect you to anticipate a pig falling out of the sky. Because if those cakes have a fender bender in the trunk, you won’t live to tell about it! (PS they were all delivered in pristine condition.)

Each car has a chocolate letter on it (yep, made those myself too) that spells out Happy Birthday Caleb #3

There’s even a Lightning McQueen

you and cousin BJ

Three towering candles

A chocolate muffin with candles for the birthday boy this morning. Charley was there to help blow them out. And eat some muffin.

One of the most common phrases in our household is now “I can do it aww by mysewf.” Everything from climbing in the car, going down steps, and using adult silverware to trying to dress yourself, putting on your shoes, and reading (reciting from memory) books. You have yet to apply this newly found independence to potty training though. Soon enough, soon enough.You have become our car radio. You sing us down the road every car trip now. We exchange glances and giggle in the front seat over how adorable you sound. Your birthday party was moved to its rain-date location at the church. The whole way home yesterday, you sang to us, “Wain Wain Go away, Come again a-nut-der day…”I love that you can pronounce words such as Mississippi and Maximum Destruction, but no matter how many times we tell you that our orange cat is a boy named Bubbus, you insist that she is a girl and her name is Bobbis. We pronounce Bub-bus very clearly and you respond Bob-bis with the same clarity.

In your hooded bear towel from Auntie Julie

I love that you ask about Daddy during the day all the time as if he is a long lost friend. Once every few hours, you will ask, “Where’s my Daddy?” or say “I want my Daddy home.” You are his shadow, his little helper. Anything he is working on. From changing tires, to working on ovens to fixing coffee. You are right there, soaking up information about the task at hand. If it involves tools, you will no doubt need your Little Tikes assortment of tools as well. Daddy has you in training, you pick flowers for me outside like they are going out of style. You have even gotten into a few landscaping beds at public places and picked flowers before I could stop you.

Playing with birthday stuff

I love that you think I belong to you. You love to be close. In my lap resting your head while we read a book. Cradled in my arms to fall asleep at naptime. Practically in my lap in a restaurant booth. Two inches in front of my face speaking as if you were three rooms away if I’m trying to nap. There are no personal boundaries. Personal space is non-existent. When Scott and I hug, you run over to worm in between our legs. You put your back against mine and push Daddy away with all your little might. The other day you even said, “Move Daddy, so I can have Mommy!” You already have me kiddo. You already have me.

Like the porcupine shirt? He chose this shirt out of about five different ones. Probably because it looks like the wolverines on the game he loves, Gulo Gulo.

Playing Froggy Boogie

One night a few weeks ago, I was sitting with you just before bed. All was dark and quiet, I couldn’t help but hug you extra tight and kiss you a few extra times. As I buried my face in your soft cheeks you whispered “You’re my best mommy.” “And you are my best Boogaman,” I replied softly. I just couldn’t let go. I couldn’t make myself put you in the bed. We sat, you cradled in my arms. Your legs hung well over the armrest. I just watched you intently. A few times you reached up and closed my eyes, as if to say “quit staring at me!” I asked if you were ready to get in bed. “Sit wif you.” Okay, but just for a few more minutes, then you must go to bed. Just for a few more minutes, need me to fix anything with a hug. Just for a few more minutes, stay little. Just for a few more minutes.

I love you more today than I did yesterday. And I’ll love you more tomorrow than I did today. Happy birthday Little Man.

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A Toddlers Creed

If it is on, I must turn it off.
If it is off, I must turn it on.
If it is folded, I must unfold it.
If it is a liquid, it must be shaken, then spilled.

If it a solid, it must be crumbled, chewed or smeared.
If it is high, it must be reached.
If it is shelved, it must be unshelved.
If it is pointed, it must be run with at top speed.

If it has leaves or flowers, they must be picked.
If it is plugged, it must be unplugged.
If it is not trash, it must be thrown away.
If it is in the trash, it must be removed, inspected, and thrown on the floor.

If it is closed, it must be opened.
If it does not open, it must be screamed at.
If it has drawers, they must be rifled.
If it is a pencil, it must write on the refrigerator, monitor, or table.

If it is full, it will be more interesting emptied.
If it is empty, it will be more interesting full.
If it is a pile of dirt, it must be laid upon.
If it is stroller, it must under no circumstances be ridden in without protest.

If it is a shopping cart, it also may not be ridden in, it must be pushed by me instead.
If it has a flat surface, it must be banged upon.
If Mommy’s hands are full, I must be carried.
If Mommy is in a hurry and wants to carry me, I must walk alone.

If it is paper, it must be torn.
If it has buttons, they must be pressed.
If the volume is low, it must go high.
If it is toilet paper, it must be unrolled on the floor.

If it is a drawer, it must be pulled upon.
If it is a toothbrush, it must be inserted into my mouth.
If it has a faucet, it must be turned on at full force.
If it is a phone, I must talk to it.

If it is a bug, it must be swallowed.
If it doesn’t stay on my spoon, it must be dropped on the floor.
If it is not food, it must be tasted.
If it IS food, it must not be tasted.

If it is dry, it must be made wet with drool, milk, or toilet water.
If it is Mommy, it must be hugged.
I am toddler . . . and I am proud!

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My mom is here today, so Caleb felt it appropriate to show off my parenting skills. He was working on a toy car that has a broken wheel. It is actually Lightning McQueen bubble bath, so it isn’t really meant to be a “toy.” The bumper comes off the back to reveal the cap to the bubble bath. He has banged it around so much using it as a toy car, that the wheel fell off. So he found his hammer and got to work on this wheel. When it popped back off he exclaimed, as loud and as clear as a bell, “OH DAMNIT.” But he didn’t stop there, he went on to say it several more times over the course of the next hour. So when I put him down for a nap, we had a long talk about why we shouldn’t use words like that and what should say instead. I told him to be sure and help Mommy and Daddy talk nicely too if he hears us say a bad word. Momma told me about seeing a mother and her little girl in the store today. The mother was asking the little girl to behave and she whipped around and said “Oh shutup!” The mom was so embarrassed and of course said “Excuse me! Where did you hear that? We don’t talk like that.” My mom was trying not to giggle but she leaned over and said “probably at preschool.”

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The pressures of the kitchen were just to much for him.

Yes that is a Christmas decoration behind him.  Shutup.

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We spent the entire day riding out 3/4ths of my $60 per fill up gas tank looking for a new place. Because nothing quite says Happy Birthday like “you’re evicted.” No they didn’t really say that. At least not in so many words. Scott asked our landlord’s daughter what they were planning to do with the property when her mother passes away. They are going to sell everything. Sucks for us seeing as how we live here and all. We aren’t in a position to buy. But it was really just how I wanted to spend my birthday. Caleb was so patient today though. I couldn’t have asked him to be better. We spent the majority of the day in the car. By the time we got home tonight he was feeling a little frisky from being cooped up all day. In other words, he was still bouncing off the walls at 10pm. I wrangled him into the kitchen and picked him up to brush his teeth. As he struggled and squirmed, he said “Stand down sistah!” I just about dropped him laughing. That’s right, my two year old (I have five days!) told me to stand down sistah. Wow. Scott says he got it from Over The Hedge, but for the life of me, I can’t remember that part.

Edit: We figured it out…when the Verminator first arrives on the scene when the opossusm is playing dead in the street.  He tells one of the them to stand down sister.  Probably the crazy ‘president of the home owner’s association’ because she was flipping out.

It is the most popular movie at out house right now. And I mean really, do you wanna help me find my nuts?!

He’s still laying in bed laughing and giggling at random even though it’s now going on 11pm. How could I not have a happy birthday? I am one lucky lady.

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Before we went outside yesterday afternoon, I may or may not have called you “high maintenance.” You needed shoes. Then a jacket. The a hat. Then sunglasses. Are we preparing for the prom here? I see an independent streak developing, where you are exercising your right to choose. To pick things out. To select one thing over another. Your shaggy mop was overdue for a trim the other day, which is usually a long process. I decided to use a different approach. I told you it had to be done that day. But I gave you some options so that you could “control” the situation. It wasn’t being forced upon you. I asked if you wanted me to trim your hair or someone at a store. You chose me. I usually use your booster chair from the kitchen table, but I instead gave you the option of choosing your booster chair or your bench from your art table. You selected the bench. Then I gave you two different TV shows to decide between. Worked like a charm, you did great!

Counting something. I forget what. As long as you are talking, it doesn’t really matter what you are saying. You just have to be talking. All. Day. Long.

Laughing at Charley going down the slide

This is your kitty. You love her. She “likes” you. By “likes,” I mean she cautiously plays with you. She toys with you, chases things you throw, lets you pet her, but she stays ready to bolt at any given millisecond, should you trip and fall toward her. I think she’s scared of you, yet likes playing with you all at the same time. You always giggle when she licks your fingers because her tongue feels so funny and say, “She wikes me, think she wikes me!”

Help!  I’m falling…

And I don’t want help because I can get up aww by mysewf

I don’t know why you guys think this is so funny

Perturbed about something.  Who knows what.

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We had our egg hunt shortly before lunch today. He was a pro at finding the small eggs too.  Scott hid them last year, so I did it this year.  Most had bunny money in them and a few had Hershey kisses, goldfish, yogurt bites, and a few other little treats.

Eating Hershey kisses

More Hershey kisses

Yep they get the thumbs up

So he started shaking eggs to figure out whether they had kisses in them or just money money

The bunny money was used to purchase two games:  Bunny Hop and Mr Scrambles

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I love this man! Scott on dad-duty (in his #1 shirt) painting paper mâché Easter eggs (that he even helped paper mâché!)

Look at the kitty in the background

Getting the rundown of the egg dyeing process

We already have a spill! The box was perfect for keeping the spills to a minimum though.

Nosy kitty, go on, dip a paw in there

The “me” in him was really worried about the egg container being out of balance, he wanted me to fill in those last two spaces.

Scott pulled his van over so that we’d have some music (and even turned it on country for me, yes I did notice dear, thank you!)

When he was done dancing, he said “I rock!”

Checking the color saturation on his egg. He kept saying “it needs a widdle bit wonger.”

It is finally “done.”

Ta-da!

Riding the eggs around in the boat

“Daaaaddy are you napping? Wake up Daaaddy!”

I brought out a container of water so he could play with his boats

Our giant egg hunt loot. Please don’t look closely at them, they are embarrassing!

No holiday would be complete without Hot Wheels!

He got an Anamalz giraffe in one of his eggs. Scott told him it was Charley’s little brother Chuck. When bedtime came, he brought Charley and Chuck in the bedroom. I used a folded receiving blanket to make Chuck a bed, and tucked it beside Caleb’s pillow. Scott said he came back in with Charley and Chuck this morning when he woke up.

They didn’t look significantly better than this before they were opened! Oh well, it was a learning process. I learned that I should have started about two weeks ago!

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happy keester!

Mar 23

Posted by: Rachel in: blog, current events

The ONLY thing that could have made this funnier? An Easter egg placed under the baby third from the left.

Oh the powers of a photoshop knockoff program, courtesy of me.

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We had such an awesome fun day today. We overslept big time. I didn’t wake up until 9:40! About three minutes after that I remembered that my friend Amber was coming by. In two minutes!   She had said they would be there at 9:45, but luckily they were running a little behind schedule as well. They arrived a little after 10 to see the atrocity that is my house. I’m still so embarrassed, sorry about that guys!  We stayed up late last night to paper mâché all the eggs…which was a lot bigger “project” than I had anticipated (or planned for). They were none too pretty in the end, but were a big hit none-the-less.

I woke Caleb up from his nap today and said, “Who’s ready to dye Easter eggs?”  Without a sound, his eyes got really wide, and me pointed to himself.  We had been planning to do it all week. I bought a cheap shirt at Walmart on the suspicion that it would get dye on it, which it did. But the weather was a little chilly for short sleeves earlier this week. Then it rained. Finally I just figured I would do it inside but time constraints and disciplinary tactics resulted in more postponement. But in the end, it worked out perfectly. Today was gorgeous and 75 degrees.

I ran to Walmart tonight looking for plastic eggs and they were sold out! Luckily Kmart had some. We did the giant egg hunt tonight. I got the wagon out of the storage building for a “basket” and we armed Caleb with his flashlight. He pretty much found every one by himself with almost no help. He was so excited, he kept saying “giant Easter eggs” over and over but he would emphasize “giant” in this deep voice like you would imagine or imitate a giant speaking.

There are, of course, tons of pictures. So many in fact, that I don’t have time to get them posted tonight! To be continued…

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